February 14th $$

I say Happy Valentine's Day with mixed feelings. The unrealistic expectations created by the "Buy" industry has turned 2/14 into almost a certain guarantee of disappointment. The wish for a happy day can never match the fantasies of floating on air, showered with jewels and kissed by roses. What I wish is for everyone to find happiness in their connections with others today, with friends, work buddies, strangers, to realize that that smile you share means something to the one receiving it. If I see you, send me a smile. That's what will make February 14th special. Happy Valentine's Day for real.

Tulips instead of roses to make you smile.

Weather or Not

Heavy rain, hail, tonado touchdown
yesterday
Carolina blue and candy pink sky
Nature's lesson for today
Somewhere out there
Is the answer
Or not

Light

I woke up before the sun, the dreams following me into the dark of the new morning. It would be the same as yesterday, the same as tomorrow, craziness hovering just out of sight, its poison infecting those I love. The only solution was to descend to the level it lived on, beat it at its own game. But that would give it validation. Crazy would act crazy until it forced the sane to play its game. Suspended between night and day, I realized I could not play Evil and I was not God.

My eyes lifted toward the window. A hint of baby soft pink stained the mountains. Would I travel across them? Seek to make sense of the irrational? For a moment the color fooled me into hoping. A sigh washed across my thoughts, a prayer whispered its way toward the dawn. There was no answer, the same as yesterday, the same as tomorrow.

Light filled the sky and I stood up and stepped into my world.

Warrior Mountain

Up on our mountain property this afternoon, we sat in the silence and watched hawks soar below us. They rode the currents of the wind, a wing tip here, a dive there, playing with the day. I looked out over the piedmont, a vast ocean of green, watched the sun crown the mountains, the shadows blanket the valleys. This Earth of ours is a special world and on this day, I soared in my mind with the redtails consumed by the joy of being part of it all.

Rain on Me

It quit raining for a little while and feeling smart I went out to empty the horses water trough during the break in weather. I scrubbed it without getting myself wet and was very pleased that I'd avoided the water from that and the rain from above. Then, I set it upright and dropped the hose in. I stood back and crossed my arms, thinking this is going to be a good day. The hose agreed. It went on a wild snake dance celebrating the moment, and soaked me from head to foot before I could get it under control. Think I'll take a hot shower(since I'm already wet) and go back to bed, this being one of those kind of days.

One Nation under God, indivisible, with Liberty, and Justice for All

On this, the tenth remembrance day of a tragedy that rocked us as individuals and our nation’s soul, I feel the sorrow, the fear, and the love triggered by the attacks. Most of all, I feel the love. My hand floats gently across the flag, folded in the triangle shape when given to my Mother upon my step-father’s death, the flag that draped the coffin of a man who served long before 9/11. I remember shaking it out of that triangular shape on September 11, 2001, climbing onto the rail of the front porch and securing it to the edge of the roof. I marveled at its size, it takes a lot to cover a coffin, and I realized it takes even more to kill the soul of a nation.

As it unfolded in the breeze, the sense of security it gave me against the attack upon our country was something I hadn’t expected, a gift passed on from an older generation of survivors. The day seemed endless. I watched the unfolding of events on TV. Reporters told of rescue workers never hesitating in New York, air travelers giving their lives in Pennsylvania, and our government rising from the rubble in Washington and still the flag flew. My gaze strayed from the scenes on the screen to the scene outside my window. Our flag was still there. It danced in the wind, lifting its stars and stripes toward the heavens, lifting my sorrow for our losses into an over-whelming sense of pride in the strength of our nation.

Today, ten years later, as my fingers stroke the stars of my step-father’s flag, the Star Spangled Banner plays in my head and the question at the end of our anthem lingers in my heart. Oh, say does that star-spangled banner yet wave…

“Yes, it does,” I whisper as I unfurl the flag, “o’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.”

A Real Good Man

One of my son's high school swim coaches in Kansas, Greg House, died this week. He was 61. The outpouring of notes from young people who swam for him is amazing. The man inspired them all to be more than they thought they could be, to never give up and to believe that by working together anything was possible. There were more than 600 posts in a 24 hour period saying this over and over. I have no idea how many have posted now. One man, one teacher, by being there, setting standards, and believing in abilities these kids couldn't see in themselves, has given our country almost a thousand strong, honorable, giving young adults. Rest in Peace, Coach House, you've earned it and I thank you.